what's wrong with me.
fell unsafe, pathetic, moody. i just want my normal life. since the 1st week of semester 2, i got toooo stress of being a student, a friend, a person who nowhere to go, a daughter and a part time blogger. #yang last tu mcm takde kene-mengena. -.-!
just arrived home from Perjumpaan Bersama Penasihat Akademik.
watching they walking up on stage to take their penghargaan make me fell so sick.
yes i am sick to watch others victory, honest !
jealousy, the best reason..
why not Allah choose me to me among them? i am not blaming Allah, subhanallah. He knows the best for me. i just asked myself, why Allah do not choose me to be around that excellent people?
i have so many reasons on why i was not that person yang ber'dean list'.
# exam schedule tak susun best which was they put all the papers on a week. i have 5 papers fyi. no break, no rest. friends know me well, study just a day before exam. #My bad, i know
# i had learned bahasa jepon for a semester but there is nothing i can proud of. i can't even remember the 'huruf' of japan language and what the shit is when bahasa jepon was 2 credit hours. soalan punya susah macam dah 3 tahun belajar jepon. then, really kacau my pointer!
# still have an exhibition of project on study week!
# still have assignment to be complete on study week! -.-
# i was from matriculation so...... i have no idea how to continue my ayat. ok bai
# and whatever bla bla bla !
keep questioning, why i was that bad in exam but continuously build the reasons to deny my unsuccessful result.. (weh, padahal result dah lama keluar) pening kan saye ni.. ya, nak seribu daya. taknak, seribu dalih!
dah lebih bermotivasi. while typing this entri, it was take too long to finish this last words. the above sentences are just coming up when my mind is too messy. and the ending of this entry, sound like yeah, i am done with the hard feeling and now happy and legaaaa! hehe. thanks to someone who remind me to Allah's planning. thanks sebab pujuk saya balik sebelom saya sempat terjun katil. :)
p/s : awak asyik tertanye-tanye kenapa awak tak terpilih untuk menjadi yang terbaik, tapi dalam masa yang sama awak buat alasan beribu untuk menidakkan kegagalan awak, adil kah?
No matter how good or bad you think life is, wake up each day and be thankful for life. Someone somewhere else is fighting to survive.
sama2 kita renungkan. salam